Istanbul

Few places have ever effected me in such a way as Istanbul. It's been more than a year since I went, yet I still can't quite put my finger on what it was about that city that pulled me in. I'm not sure if it was noisy, cobblestone streets, maze like bazaars, or spices stacked so high that if they toppled, you would die smelling heaven. It could have been the stray cats that napped in the shade, or the big old dog that sat watching everyone in the park. Maybe it was the conjuncture of new and ancient, towering minarets and a mysterious underground Medusa head. It might have been all the families crowded into the park, breaking their Ramadan fasts, or street vendors selling roasted corn or the children eating cotton candy and shooting light up toys into the sky. Whatever it may have been, something about Istanbul drew me close, and made me feel as if I could live there my whole life. 

Perhaps the reason Istanbul had such an effect on me was the same reason I was so enthralled with India: I didn't know much about it. My knowledge of Istanbul before I went was this: it used to be called Constantinople, and before that it was Byzantium. And it had some pretty buildings. And that was it. I didn't know, for instance, that the streets were so winding and narrow in the part of town that we were staying in, that our cab driver wouldn't even know where we were going, even though we were staying next to the biggest landmark in the city. I didn't know that the fountain in Sultanahmet park lit up with different colors (at least during Ramadan) or that you could get almost any flavor of Turkish delight that you could think of. I certainly didn't know how much I would love ayasofya (Hagia Sofia). Being inside that building was the closest thing that I have ever had to a truly religious experience. The scale of it was beyond anything I could have dreamed of; it's sheer size left me in speechless wonder for more than a few 

minutes. Originally it served as the Greek Patriarchal cathedral of Constantinople, except for a short period when it was converted to a Roman Catholic cathedral. It was then converted into a mosque. Now, it's a museum. The walls of the building have beautiful mosaics depicting religious scenes. When it was converted into a mosque, they were painted over which ironically preserved them. Standing in the middle of the massive building, I was humbled. Its size and its beauty were enough to nearly bring me to tears. The upstairs balcony held a special surprise for me, other than the beautiful mosaics being restored there. On one wall, there were holes where it was obvious that ornate crosses were once there. There was something about ayasofya that could have kept me there forever. I was fascinated and enthralled by its massiveness and its history, overwhelmed by the myriad of emotions that standing in the middle of it all brought down on me. Being there brought to me the realization of  the inevitability of change and the idea that we are surrounded constantly by layers and layers of history. This was something that I kept coming back to throughout my trip, and throughout Istanbul. 
Basilica Cistern was another place that, like ayasofya, had a great effect on me. It wasn't to the extent that I had felt from ayasofya, and maybe in a slightly different way, but Basilica Cistern was one of the weirdest and most interesting places that I've been. I can't really remember the history of it, or why it was built, but I can tell you this: it is one strange place. Underground, it is an enormous cavern with hundreds  pillars and platforms that suspend you above the water it is filled with. It's dark and cool and damp and a little creepy. The platforms are slippery and it smells a bit (not too bad though). The pillars have dim lights on them and the entire time I was there, I was writing the climactic chase scene of a movie in my head. Maybe the strangest things of all in the Basilica Cistern were the Medusa column bases.  No one is sure of their origin, or what they might have been used for previously. They stare at you menacingly, striking into you a fear that perhaps they will turn you to stone and you will be trapped underground forever. Fresh air was a relief when we resurfaced.
While the grandeur of places like Blue Mosque, ayasofya, or Topkapi Palace were surely a reason that I loved the city, what I think may have caused me to fall in love with it was not the architecture (amazing), but the atmosphere. As began to set, families spilled onto the streets and into the parks, toting picnic baskets and coolers. As they spread their things out and set up their meal, lights strung between the minarets of Blue Mosque flickered on, and the official band of the night set up on stage in Sultanahmet park. Leaning against a fence and eating a big, juicy slice of watermelon that I had bought from a street vendor, I was reminded vaguely of the 4th of July. Children were running around laughing and screaming, the aroma of wonderful, wonderful food filled the air and music played on. Wandering away from the park and on down the main roads, hosts beckoned you into their restaurants while cars and the occasional streetcar (tram/train/trolley?) whizzed by. Looping back around and walking up a quieter street, the shops were closed for the evening, and through the windows you could see people eating at higher end restaurants. There was almost no one on this quieter street, and at first I thought my ears were playing tricks on me. But the noise grew louder as we approached an outdoor restaurant down the block from our hotel. Floating gently through the Istanbul night was the theme for the Godfather, being played mournfully by the live entertainment for the night. As the song played on and I returned to my hotel, I thought to myself that perhaps one day I would return to Istanbul, but the tune was carrying me to Italy, and as sad as I was to leave, you can't complain if your next destination is Venice. 

movie star hair

smiling face, train to jaisalmer

Originally uploaded by NiklasPlutte

Movie Star Hair

Picture! Picture! Can I take picture? The little girl asks me with round, chestnut eyes.
Picture? Sure, of what? I reply, bending down to the girl, who comes up only to around my belly button.
Of you! She exclaims excitedly.
Me?
Yes! You! Picture! Please?
Ok, I say wonderingly.
The little girl runs to her mother who is wearing a green punjabi suit, and tugs at her elbow, points at me, and hands her the camera. She runs back to me, towing her mother behind her. She smiles at me apologetically, and I smile back, no problem.
The little girl takes my hand in her tiny one and smiles big at the camera. I look at her and her toothy smile (the second grade, I just lost half my teeth kind) and can’t help but smile in return. The camera clicks, winds, clicks again, and we’re done.
The little girl bounds to her mother who hands her back the camera. Her mother tells her something, and the little girl scampers back over to me.
Thank you! She says, beaming.
You’re very welcome, I say. But why do you want my picture?
You have movie star hair!
I can’t help but laugh at that, and she laughs too. I’m not a movie star, I say to her.
But you have movie star hair, she says again.
Come back, calls her mother.
She smiles endearingly again, and skips back to the picnic blanket where the rest of her family sits.
When we leave the Mother India Temple, and pass their family again, the little girl waves at me, with the most radiant smile in the world. 

~molly (:

to sum up a year, and a holiday

This holiday season was... interesting.
Boats, I still do not like them. Nope. I almost threw up the first night, but then the rest of the trip was good fun! My dad didn't have a good time, but my parade was not rained on, because I barely saw him for the next 3 nights. I made some new friends, had a jolly good time, and had a Titanic-like moment on the front of the boat. I also rode up and down in the glass elevator with said friends at 2 in the morning, and ate a couple gallons worth of soft serve.
I also realized how many flippin stars there are. When you are out in the ocean at 3 a.m, you can really, really see all the stars.  I had a very deep conversation with one of my newfound friends on the time it takes light to travel, and how we aren't seeing the present. It was beautiful beyond belief. It was endless.
It was also very cold. So cold in fact, that my Titanic-like moment was cut short, and back in side we went.  There was kareoke, and I don't know whose DUMB idea it was to put the Titanic song on the list of songs to sing, but yep, it was there, and that stupid little child was singing it.  Singing us to our doom.
But thankfully, we didn't sink, and Leonardo DiCaprio didn't freeze to death. So that was good.
I enjoyed Ensenada, mostly for the harborside park it had.  It was quite lovely on Christmas day, to see all the families there with their kids playing with their new RC trucks.  Good stuff.
Once back, I was herded off to my mom's, where I suffered for around 4 days.  I lacked internet there, as well as on the boat... That was sufficiently depressing.
And back I came, to have a relatively uneventful New Year's Eve, and to ponder the past year/decade.

2009:
Not to sound cliche, but this is really a year I think I will never forget.  It was a year of triumph and new experiences.  I travelled to the other side of the world.  I watched history go down as Barack Obama was sworn in. I made friends who I've become as close as can be with.  I got in a few fights, I did great on state testing, I discovered music that I love, and I made money.  I was introduced to my favorite movie, and discovered two T.V shows that I am now obsessed with.  I cried a couple times, and lost a couple friends.  I hurt when my Dodgers lost, and was euphoric when they won.  I made the school team, and my teams won championships.  I discovered my favorite songs, and tried out a few new talents. I even ate new foods.  All in all, it was a good year. (:

~molly

my favorite ghost

His hands,

are your hands

If only in my mind

Their touch, 

if I forget,

if I close my eyes,

if I pretend,

it could be yours.

Almost.

I’d not forgotten you,

and I don’t hate you,

as you seem to think.

In fact, 

quite the opposite. 

I miss you, 

and I love you.

He’s not you.

But I was scared,

so I killed this bond,

before it could grow,

and hurt me.

Now you’re gone, 

a murmur of

a rainy Saturday

in June.

You are gone.

You are not here.

You are not mine.

I don’t pretend you are.

I must forget this.

It was my choice.

But the problem is,

I can’t.

I can’t forget the ghost,

that lingers on during the 

end of that song

or turn away from 

once inviting curbs.

You are my demon,

my haunt that won’t leave me.

But please,

don’t leave me.

You are my favorite 

ghost.

~molly c.

i'm never gonna stop the rain by complaining (:

We are a week slash two weeks into October.  Can you believe it?  (i know i can't) 

We're right up on  that time of year.  That nerve wracking, nail biting, fist clenching

couple of weeks.
That's right.
MLB postseason.
AND THE DODGERS ARE IN THE NLCS!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOO!!!!!! 
I'm going to the game Thursday.  I went to the first game of the NLDS.  Painted my face.
It was pretty awesome.
:D


School sucks.  Or, most of it does... I get so ridiculously bored, except in English. I like that class.  And the day seems to go on ffffffooooooorrrrrreeevvvvverrr. 
Meh...
We are working on a compare and contrast essay in English, about different "cliques". you must interview random (or just people that aren't part of that clique) to get stereotypes of the clique.  Then you gotta interview people from the clique.  Then you gotta write an essay about it.  This is due the 20th.  I should probably get on that.  As much as I hate when teachers give you only one or two nights to do an assignment, I do a better job than when I get two weeks to do it.  Because I am a procrastinator .  OH which reminds me I have to do that long term math assignment. FUN!
But other than that, school is good (ish)


I'm kinda sick right now, it's kinda raining, and my dad is kinda at a meeting, and i'm kinda bored, and kinda have nothing to do.
AN OPPORTUNITY TO WRITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

have a great week!
~molly (: