Sunday, November 22, 2009


Ick. I'm sick.  Or rather, I was really sick, and now I'm slightly better.
I ate for the first time since Wednesday yesterday.  Threw up 10 times Thursday.  Almost threw up yesterday.  Dry heaved around 6 times Friday.  Almost passed out during softball yesterday.
I ran out of stuff to throw up.  It was gross. Throwing up is such an awful physical sensation. You all of a sudden start sweating, and then you get awful woozy, and then the gagging, the ewwwwwwwww. Stopping. Dropped my uncle off to get on his cruise today.  Everyone in the car was talking about throwing up.  I know for a fact that none of them has thrown up in at least 10 years. I told them to shut up, I might puke on them if they don't. They did. I can barely stand.  This sucks.  I'm slowly being allowed to eat. key word slowly. Blah.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

my favorite ghost

His hands,
are your hands
If only in my mind
Their touch, 
if I forget,
if I close my eyes,
if I pretend,
it could be yours.

I’d not forgotten you,
and I don’t hate you,
as you seem to think.

In fact, 
quite the opposite. 
I miss you, 
and I love you.
He’s not you.

But I was scared,
so I killed this bond,
before it could grow,
and hurt me.
Now you’re gone, 
a murmur of
a rainy Saturday
in June.

You are gone.
You are not here.
You are not mine.
I don’t pretend you are.
I must forget this.
It was my choice.
But the problem is,
I can’t.

I can’t forget the ghost,
that lingers on during the 
end of that song
or turn away from 
once inviting curbs.
You are my demon,
my haunt that won’t leave me.
But please,
don’t leave me.
You are my favorite 
~molly c.